This past week, my nephew died suddenly, unexpectedly, and without warning. He was young so it was a shock to say the least. I’m certain all who knew and loved him are having difficulty processing it.
I was related not by blood but by former marriage. Thanks to social media, we had reconnected in the past few years. For that I am very grateful.
As with most funeral services, his friends and family took the opportunity to speak of how much he meant to them. It was apparent that he was a very positive, generous and kind person, dishing out wisdom and guidance to anyone who needed it. Always lending a helpful hand without hesitation. Many came to depend on the love and laughter he brought to the table. And his hugs. Those big bear hugs!
But the thing that grabbed me most was what his wife said. Near the end she stood up, admitting she hadn’t intended to speak, as she didn’t feel she could hold it all together. I’m so glad she did; her words were both simple yet profound:
“Don’t skip it. We did it every morning. When one of us left the house, we would always say I love you as the last words. This way if anything happened, it would be the last thing heard.
Even if he ticked me off, as he often did, I would still be sure to say I love you.
One day after I said, ‘Have a good day, I love you’, he said, ‘Half day. I’m only working a half day.’ I said, ‘Ok, half day and I love you.’ I had to say those three words last.
You never know when it will be your last time to see that person. Don’t skip it.”
How many times I’ve overlooked the importance of that final moment of saying goodbye. Maybe I’m irritated, or too busy or too distracted.
“Don’t skip it.”
I won’t. Thank you, Maggie.
Oh, and I love you.
~Carolyn
Now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love. (1Corinthians 13:13 NIV)
“Life isn’t easy. Together we can make it better.”
Very powerful. Great reminder.
I was very moved by her words.
Carolyn,
So sorry for your loss, I will be praying for your family.
I too, never “skip” telling Steve “I love you” or “Love you” before heading out.
Take care and take comfort in your wonderful memories of him.
Thank you, and I will follow your example as well.
No regrets – tell your loved ones every day how much they mean to you.
Thank you for sharing, and I’m sorry for your loss.
Yes! No regrets.
Beautiful post, by the end I was crying. I love you mommy!
I love you more. :)
I am saddened for your loss. I often forget to share my feelings with those around me, including those closest. This is a powerful reminder of the need to share my sentiments.
Yes, I am determined to do better.
You never forget telling me. My beautiful daughter. I love you, mom.
Awe, thanks Momma, I love you more!
Thanks for your patience. I love you, mom
Apparently I stopped getting your posts for a while and this was one that I hadn’t seen before. I’m so glad I had the opportunity to read it. My husband and I often say, “I love you,” but not always. How awful I would feel if something happened and that was a day I hadn’t said it. Thank you for sharing this. I’m till teary-eyed.
Lynn, thank you for reading it after all this time. I cherish her advice and follow it daily. ~Carolyn