“Change is good.” A radiologist I’d worked with for many years said this to me. He even scribbled it in the group card handed to me at a farewell party. I wasn’t feeling that way. I was leaving my job of nine years and moving on to a new one. It was a choice I had to make, not one that I welcomed. Going through a divorce, I simply needed more money.
I’d also injured my back that year. Change is good? I didn’t think so. In fact, I had the main risk factors for a heart attack: a change in health, marital status and employment. I felt as if my life were sinking to a new low. Tough times were behind and ahead, and I was unsure if I would make it through.
Change is good? I wanted to shout at the doctor instead, NO. Life is hard!
Back in 7th grade sociology, I remember learning that people are resistant to change. “But we’ve always done it this way” was a phrase often used.
Change is difficult. Some welcome it. I did not. A whole new world awaited me. I wanted the safety of the old one. Even if it wasn’t ideal, even though there were way too many struggles and difficulties, as least I could depend on what it was. There were no surprises. I’d become accustomed to my miserable existence.
As I began my new job as an agency tech, I realized unless I turned to the Lord for help, I simply wasn’t going to make it. My own strength was not going to be enough. I felt weak, lost and alone, yet I was expected to work fast, accurately and confidently.
During my nearly one hour drive to work each day, I turned to my Christian music cds to inspire and energize me. I listened. I sang along. I prayed. My prayers were simple. I didn’t ask for much, just the strength for the day at hand. “Lord, just help me through this day.”
As I entered the doors of each hospital I was assigned to, I stood up straight, held my head up high, and spoke with the confidence I wasn’t feeling. As time went on, I began to feel the sureness in my abilities that I was outwardly displaying in my corner of the world.
Although my time with the agency was not quite a year, I can say it was time well spent. I look back at it now, and see how much I grew. I went from a person afraid of her own shadow, to the confident worker I wanted to be. I could do anything I set my mind to.
But I didn’t do this on my own. The Lord was with me every step of the way. I prayed heading in to work each day, and I thanked him at the end as I headed back to my car.
Is change good? At the time, it may not seem that way. Ultimately, it can work for your benefit.
Trust the journey. Be open to the growth that can come. But first and foremost, trust your God to be with you. Turn to Him for the strength and help you need. He’ll be there for you. I know.
-Carolyn
“Life isn’t easy. Together we can make it better.”
