The memories from high school have become tangled and faded, just like the tassels that hung from my cap. There were some good times, and some bad times. Many people say high school is the best time of your life. For me, not so much. I was rather glad when it was over.
It was a rough time, those last two years. I struggled with eating disorders, at a time when it wasn’t even recognized or named. My family life was falling apart. My friend base was at my church in another town. I had wonderful experiences there, but in the daily routine of the high school corridor, I felt very alone.
Naturally, there were a lot of cliques. If you weren’t part of one, it was isolating. I recall that during the last two weeks of school there was a different mentality. Everybody was everyone’s friend; the boundaries were relaxed. There was an air of excitement as graduation drew near. I wondered why it couldn’t have been like that all along. How nice that would have been!
Life goes on. The pain and angst I felt during those years faded as a different life took over. Marriage, kids, career, new house, etc. None of that old stuff mattered anymore. Until the reunion invitation arrived in my inbox.
To go or not to go. I didn’t sign up right away, wasn’t going to really. But I did. And the old angst came creeping back. What if I wear the wrong thing, say the wrong thing, do the wrong thing. What if nobody likes me? I want to laugh at myself and how ridiculous this sounds.
Oh, good grief. Those silly teenage voices in my head. Who cares? Go. Have fun. Besides, who knows how many more opportunities there will be. None of us are getting any younger!
My husband assumed he’d go with me. I told him I didn’t want him to. I was a geek back then, well, I suppose a nerd, in 70’s terms. I didn’t want him to see me in that setting. I’d rather he know me as the confident woman I am now, even if I’m pretending at times. But he won. He’s going. Probably just as well. I’m terribly group shy, and he’s a better conversationalist anyway.
I can only hope it’s like those last two weeks before graduation, where we are all friends…
A friend loves at all times… Proverbs 17:17 (NIV)
Have you attended a reunion? What was your experience like? I’d love to hear about it, feel free to share in the comments.
~Carolyn
“Life isn’t easy. Together we can make it better.”
My first reunion was our 35th. I felt much the same while in high school. I became very excited about meeting and getting to know all of the people I went to school with, but wasn’t part of a click… I’m so thankful I went, and I am very excited to for tonight. Come, enjoy…you will have a great time
Randy Hirsch Litt
Thank you, Randy, I’ll see you there!
Hi Carolyn! My first reunion was the 5th. Ridiculous. I was married to my high school sweetheart, who also graduated with me, so it was just more of the same “partying” with more of the same people. But since I was such a “dog” in high school (bad skin, lousy self-esteem as a result) I couldn’t wait until another reunion. Hence, my 20th, with my current husband, was a good choice. I looked fantastic, my skin had cleared up, I was happy. No one recognized me and then when they learned who I was after only being there a few minutes, and were shocked, I was ready to leave. That’s all I wanted….to be recognized as someone OTHER than the ugly duckling I was in High School!!
You were validated, my beautiful friend! I’m so sorry for the meanness you had to endure.
Hold your head up high. You have had a rough time at high school. I know your pain. I’ve been where you were, eating disorder on top of everything else. But i got through it. You will get through this reunion too. Just remember what you are feeling, the rest of your peers are feeling the same way. You are not a nerd/ geek! You have accomplished so much and you have a loving and beautiful family. Don’t dwell on your past. You have met so many positive milestones. Be proud of yourself. You have come a long way. If silly things are brought up at the reunion, then just laugh at them. Good luck xxoo
Thank you, Lisa!
Wow, I can identify. I’ve never been to a class reunion. Have no desire to go. It’s not an option anyway because my high school is 800 miles from here! Keep blogging, Carolyn. And be sure to finish this story.
I will do that, Marlene. Thank you!